Page 1 of 2 1 2 >
Topic Options
#1817 - 05/09/13 12:15 PM BDSM and ADD
RCcellmate Offline


Registered: 02/08/13
Posts: 10
Loc: Walnut Creek, Ca
I was sitting in a meeting last week with my son's school, doctor and myself discussing his ADD, but some of it hit home with me. My childhood was in the 70's, so I was just an active kid and now I am just a active, driven, don't sleep much, successful, bright, adrenaline junkie adult.

A look back at my BDSM life and some things stand out on why they have worked and of course why they went sideways:

1) The one trick Pony: I have learned that I need/require/ want a Mistress that can multitask. If it is X then Y the Z, my mind is lost, but if I have multiple sensations going then I am better able to stay in my subspace.

2) Sensory Play: If I lose my eyesight, ability to speak or my hearing....again I am able to focus and not be diverted.

3) Having a schedule with my Mistress helps as well. Knowing that I have a session every 2 weeks.....again I am not diverted.

I serve Miss Grey and I am sure I am high maintenance, but it is awesome to be able to play with someone that keeps me engaged, challenges my mind and is just a great person..not to mention one of the kinkiest minds around. Thank you MG!!!

Top
#1819 - 05/09/13 07:29 PM Re: BDSM and ADD [Re: RCcellmate]
Ms Regan Black Offline
www.MsReganBlack.com


Registered: 10/29/12
Posts: 819
Loc: New York City / Buffalo

Hi, RCcellmate-

Very interesting.

To go on a tangent-
in my vanilla career, I work closely with a few people that are diagnosed ADD/ADHD. As someone who is hyper-focused, deals with numbers, and cannot make distracted mistakes because that costs huge $, I find those interactions quite challenging. Are there any techniques you would recommend I try?

Regards
-MRB
_________________________
Site
PhotoBlog
Email

Top
#1823 - 05/11/13 07:35 AM Re: BDSM and ADD [Re: Ms Regan Black]
Soapy Offline


Registered: 02/04/13
Posts: 433
Loc: USA,USA
Good for you!

It seems like everyone for the past few years who is bored claims they have ADD, can't focus, etc.
_________________________
"Violent opining on a bdsm board has solved surprisingly few geopolitical issues."

- Ms. Regan Black

Top
#1829 - 05/12/13 02:22 PM Re: BDSM and ADD [Re: Ms Regan Black]
kefxb24 Offline


Registered: 02/05/13
Posts: 7
Loc: Philadelphia area
Originally Posted By: Ms Regan Black


To go on a tangent-



A tangent from the Tangent Queen...

Top
#1830 - 05/12/13 02:25 PM Re: BDSM and ADD [Re: RCcellmate]
kefxb24 Offline


Registered: 02/05/13
Posts: 7
Loc: Philadelphia area
As one with ADD, I fully understand and empathize with your first and second statements. It took me a long time, and some meds, to become aware of how ADD impacts my sessions.

Top
#1832 - 05/12/13 10:52 PM Re: BDSM and ADD [Re: kefxb24]
Ms Regan Black Offline
www.MsReganBlack.com


Registered: 10/29/12
Posts: 819
Loc: New York City / Buffalo

Hey, it's how I roll.

-MRB
_________________________
Site
PhotoBlog
Email

Top
#1854 - 05/18/13 09:24 PM Re: BDSM and ADD [Re: kefxb24]
Ms Regan Black Offline
www.MsReganBlack.com


Registered: 10/29/12
Posts: 819
Loc: New York City / Buffalo

Hi, kefxb-

How would say your sessions have evolved over that time?

-MRB
_________________________
Site
PhotoBlog
Email

Top
#1879 - 05/20/13 10:08 PM Re: BDSM and ADD [Re: Ms Regan Black]
kefxb24 Offline


Registered: 02/05/13
Posts: 7
Loc: Philadelphia area
My kink years are categorized as before ADD meds and after ADD meds because the differences are very clear to me.

Before being medically treated for ADD, it was impossible for me to understand the concept of making a connection as part of my kink play. My behavior was similar to ordering off a menu, so to speak. Yet, the more I ordered, the more frustrating my sessions. While generally I got what I ordered, the results were less than satisfying and I was missing out on the creative and dynamic aspects of professional sessions. Put another way, I was always waiting for that next session to be the magical session of my dreams. In addition, it is fair to say that I was not adding my energy to a session - just taking whatever energy was offered. I must have been a real drag.

Immediately after beginning medication, just about every facet of my life changed, mostly for the better. Besides lifting the life long "cloud over my head", I could clearly see that my kink play needed to change from ordering off the menu to getting on the roller coaster. Within two sessions, I found myself enjoying, it not yearning, for the stress relief aspect. I slowly learned to give into the experiences produced by others, with the understanding that, in general, once I got onto the roller coaster there was no getting off until the ride was over. Sure, I have my likes and dislikes, but beyond that I now enjoy leaving the driving to someone else. And, most importantly, at the end of a session I enjoy feeling that I have done my part to participate and provide my energy into the overall experience.

In a nutshell, before meds I was taking but not giving - and I was clueless to boot. After meds, I have been taking and giving - and I feel comfortable with my contributions to each experience.

Or, maybe the meds are just making me think things are better! smirk

Top
#1882 - 05/21/13 12:20 AM Re: BDSM and ADD [Re: RCcellmate]
mrpotatohead Offline


Registered: 02/09/13
Posts: 61
Loc: USA
Interesting, I haven't thought about this before. When I am at work it is a bit harder to focus when multi-tasking, and I prefer to work on one project, finish it and move on to the next thing; though I have learned to do both pretty well..

Playing in session it is just the opposite and I really enjoy sensory overload and unpredictability.

Btw, I used to live in Walnut Creek back in the 90s. Went back last year and alot has changed since then..

Top
#2079 - 06/10/13 06:28 PM Re: BDSM and ADD [Re: kefxb24]
Miss Grey Offline



Registered: 12/11/12
Posts: 96
Loc: San Francisco Bay Area, Califo...
This is a truly beautiful explanation of how medications changed your sessions for the better, and I wish every submissive would read it. Not that every sub requires ADD meds, but every sub should know how much his or her presence matters to the overall scene.

I am always moved when a bottom realizes, through whatever means, how important his energy and spiritual generosity are to the quality and exchange of a scene. Good kink requires real intimacy, not possible if one participant is holding out or psychologically absent.

I'm happy for you and your play partners!


Edited by Miss Grey (06/10/13 06:28 PM)
_________________________
Website: www.mygreyheaven.com
Twitter: www.twitter.com/mygreyheaven

Top
Page 1 of 2 1 2 >

Moderator:  Miss Grey 
September
Su M Tu W Th F Sa
1
2 3 4 5 6 7 8
9 10 11 12 13 14 15
16 17 18 19 20 21 22
23 24 25 26 27 28 29
30
Who's Online
0 registered (), 35 Guests and 2 Spiders online.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Today's Birthdays
No Birthdays

AllStarDoms